The Mouse'stash by Silvia + Bexsue

Do you ever wonder if you’re a narcissist ?

Narcissim : an exceptional interest in and admiration of oneself.

According to Greek Mythology, Narcissus or Narkissos was a beautiful young man who fell in love with his own reflection. The more he looked, the more he liked what he saw. 

Are you a person who derives pleasure from the admiration of your own body or self?  Hmmm. Let’s see. I think of myself constantly, wondering what I can do to please myself best.  All my actions are designed to cement the importance of my self in this world and to that end, I am marked by self-love and self-absorption.

There is indeed nothing wrong with loving yourself.  Ladies, if you are absorbed in fashion then I hate to break it to you but you must master self absorption better than anybody else. 

So, when you see a woman on the street and you find yourself admiring her style - whether it be her clothes, haircut, hair color, the way she carries herself - there is no reason why you can’t be in her shoes. Literally. If this person is fabulous, I guarantee there is a big dose of narcissism going on.

So turn your envy and self-doubt to narcissistic therapeutic action! Go to the gym! Take up yoga or Pilate’s.  Start that cleanse and reward yourself with that new skinny mirror.  Dump that person in your life if he or she is not embracing and supporting your essential narcissism!

Take exceptional interest in yourself. Admire yourself. Un-tuck the tail between your legs, Miss Pussy. Hear yourself purr and admire the sound.  Be your own biggest fan. 

It’s that time of the year. Summmmmmmertime!!!! For months now we have been hiding under layers of clothing, occasionally peeking out from behind drab shades of blues and blacks. If you were one of the many that made a resolution to get in shape for the New Year and managed to actually achieve it, you’re probably ready to flip a little finger at your fall clothes! It’s definitely time to play in the sun, showcasing those fine, newly-toned thighs or the beautiful flatness where once there was just a familiar bulge. In the spirit of sunshine renewal, here are some wise fashion tips from The Mouse’stash.

The Big Flop.

Why oh why do people insist on wearing flip flops?! As if your feet are burning up! We all know that they are not! Feet should not be naked, unless you are at the beach accompanied by the rest of your half-naked body. So NO you should not flip flop around town!

Dressing like a spring breaker.

This one almost speaks for itself. I’ll simply add that this particular list contains without exception: flip flops, tube tops, and yes pig tails! The simple rule: replace cute with elegant.

Don’t be a tanorexic!

Stop abusing the sun! And tanning beds! A healthy glow should look like the sun has kissed you, not raped you! A little sun and a dash of luxury bronzer is all you need.

To set the scene on this topic, indulge me in some SATC season 1 dialogue:

CARRIE:

She is leaving an apartment

after a one night stand in a

little black dress and heels

I left feeling powerful, potent and incredibly alive. I felt like I owned the city. Nothing and no one could get in my way.

[A passer-by collides with her and knocks her purse on to the street. She bends down to collect the contents. Mr. Big appears and picks up a row of condoms and hands them to her]

No. 1 he’s very handsome. No. 2 he’s not wearing a wedding ring. No. 3 he knows I carry a supply of ultra-textured Trojans with a reservoir tip.

This is one of my very favorite scenes from Sex And the City. It’s a message we can all relate to : If you’re a modern, single, and active woman - I’m talking about your sex life here ladies, not your workout regimen - then one of the mainstays in your bag should be Mr. Trojan. And it doesn’t matter whether you bring along Mr Twisted Pleasure, Mr MagnumXL or Mr Warm Sensations, he needs to be a staple of the single woman’s sexual diet.

If you are like me and you need a little excuse to shop. I’ve found cute little ways to hide Mr. Trojan. His very own stylish and discreet hide-out. You cannot predict the future ladies, but you can always be prepared. Check out these fun websites that all sell condom cases and sleeves.

www.justincaseinc.com

www.soykdesigns.com

Let’s give blog to the super cool guy who taught us how to change our first flat tire, assisted in our first oil change, parallel park using shopping carts, ski without dragging our ski poles, sent us to school with the coolest show-n-tells, taught us how be tough, taught us how to be modest, how to treat and love our family, how to eat.. cause this man sure knows how to eat!! Thank you for our homemade ice cream, our homemade root beer.. so cool! The tree house, the tire swing, Lacy’s home gymnastics gym, our Halloween costumes you made, that one time you knew I didn’t want to talk about it, so we didn’t, but you stayed there with me the whole time. The countless times you took us here, dropped us there, hauled us wherever we wanted to go, Mexico and back a billion times. For cutting and buttering our pancakes, for the Mickey Mouse shaped pancakes, for our lessons in integrity, for your example of love and hard work. Dad thank you for this family, for all my brothers and sisters; for my Josh, for my Lacy, for my Ariane, for my Alkimia, for my Ryan, for my Brandon, for making my mom so happy. Mommie Flora, thank you for supporting Dad all these years!  Happy fathers day, super cool and talented, Papito Tom.

I am on a journey with my future, my heart shaped roller coaster, and a few sad stories. I bid farewell with luggage full of colorful dresses, encouraging words, outrages disappointments, and countless blessings. I am on a quest for truth, for inspiration, for independents, beauty, and healing. I am a lovely artist, a designer of all pretty things, I am an open heart, a broken heart, a forgiver, an explorer.. -bexsue

Girls, it’s just two short days till my move to New York, and I had to take a quick break from my mountainous piles, and what now seems to be an endless amount of sorting, folding, packing or tossing, to so share some thoughts and pretty photos..

If you are a size seven shoe, petite dress, and crush on Betsey Johnson, head to the Wasteland, in West Hollywood, Melrose Ave. and Gardner St. first thing tomorrow morning. There you will find loose objects of my affection.. that might not fit my luggage, but will always fit my heart..

A charming red hat with two ladybug shaped buttons, and a silk ladybug print interior, so you feel just as pretty on the inside..

A gingham print summer number, pink glittery Polly Pumps, silver glittery Polly Pumps, a flor de lis print sweetheart dress.. + lots + lots more..

Packing will continue tomorrow, sleep is well overdue. Goodnight my lovely mice.

If you order your steak well done, even med well, on rare occasions I know at, “med”, we’re not going out on a second date..

If you fancy a girl’s breast without as much, if not more, regard to her fanny..

If you don’t have what it takes to build a small comfortable tree house..

If you house the following; A black leather couch, black bath-mattes or bath-towels, fake house plants, a Nintendo Wii, a refrigerator continuously containing nothing but liquid beverages, a Mother, because it’s in fact her house, you’re probably not the boy for me, my sisters, or my cute eligible friends..

If you chill in your sunglasses after sunshine hours, you’re quite possibly the worst boy for me…

If you wear loose underwear with shapes, stripes, or IMAGES, and you have to stuff, tuck, or smooth, each time you pull up your pants..

If you’re over the age of 30 and your spirit resembles Peter Pan.. Or if you’re over the age of 20 and your person resembles Snow White’s, little forest roommates, we’d probably make delightful friends, but not so delightful happily ever afters..

If you watch American football or the “Lakers”, with the same intense stare you have when you watch me getting undressed.. We’re not making it to round two..

If Cancun is your Idea of the perfect trip and or you want to get married in Hawaii..

If you fuss with yourself in the mirror, do your hair, worry more about what YOU will wear when WE go out to meet your friends..

If you are a DJ, model, self proclaimed Pastor, only child, recreational lover, pink, have a pet snake, a pet rodent, a pet lizard, have smaller hands than me, thinks just because my best girlfriend is promiscuous I too should not be trusted, a longer pinkie fingernail then yours truly, talks about his car in conversations not only relating to oil change or tune ups, has a membership to the tanning salon or Golds Gym, doesn’t look at his mother like she is the biz, Pees in his wetsuit.. jk you know who, sleeps in past 9am, thinks that sex should only be had on beds, was a bully in high school, is unkind and lost, but finds comfort in change, because that change will find him indeed kind..

..there are noooo, ifs, ands, or butts about it, we will never be..

Anonymous asked: I've been reading The Mousestash all year long! I was heart broken when it took such a long break, happy you're back and back with the option to comment.

My question to you is regarding your last post, the one on "One Night Stands" If you really like your boy in which you had a One Night Stand and the next day he asks you for your number, but asks like this, "So I should probably get your phone nuuuumbbeer right?".. Does this mean he feels obligated? But I already made it clear to him that he shouldn't! Or does this just mean he's awkward because hook ups like these are always a little awkward and maybe there's a chance he really does like me and wants my number?

Kitty xox

Thanks for being so loyal, Kitty! We don’t plan on taking another break like that one again. About your question, I can’t tell you for sure wether or not he will call, however I can help you with the if and when he does call. Now unfortunately, liking you, and calling you, are two separate things. If he calls you within the first two days and it’s BEFORE 10:00pm he probably does indeed like you, but if it’s a week or so later, and after 12:30am, he’s probably just ready for round two, this isn’t to saying he won’t develop stronger feelings in the future, but for now, he’s just looking to hook up! The Mouse’stash

We’ve all been there before.  You know you shouldn’t but you will and after a few cocktails - scratch that, a few too many cocktails - there is no doubt that you will.

So there you are on The Morning After. You wake up alone and cold in a semi-stranger’s bed. You look around the strange room with terrified Bambi eyes. You tell yourself to get it together. To pick up your pride and your panties and get on with your day.

He has! He’s in the shower and getting ready for work! Oh this is always the worst part, girls. You feel like Marilyn Monroe at rock bottom. Or worse, Rizzo from Grease. In a moment, the beautiful stranger who seemed so irresistible last night is going to walk out of the shower, squeaky clean.  Before you’ve managed to straighten your hair or find those damn panties and he’s already ruthlessly washed your genetic history down the drain. 

You fumble, you curse, you can’t find any of your smalls. You finally get dressed in a panic and unthinkingly make his bed. Wrong! Oh shit!  You know to never ever make the bed of your one night stand. You are not his mother, house keeper or wife for god’s sake! Nor is he going to have more respect for you. He is a bachelor and you just rode him like a cow girl!

 OK ladies, I’m sensing it might be time for a quick re-cap of one-stand do’s and dont’s here:  

Rule 1: Always be prepared. Always carry Listerine strips and a small vile of hard-to-forget perfume. While this young buck is in the shower, practice your best cum-hither again pose. This usually involves tousled hair and a little peek-a-boo with your best asset. Whether it be a breast, butt cheek, thigh - you can only pick one to allure him back under the sheets. 
 
Rule 2: When he comes back to check up on you, pretend that you are still peacefully slumbering after the best night of your life.  When he gently brings you to wakefulness, perform a languorous, sexy, cat-like stretch and in your sleepiest and sexiest voice say something like this: 
 
“You going to work?” (pout) But mornings are my most flexible!” If he goes for it and the both of you engage in a very dirty round two, then it wasn’t a drunken mistake. If he tells you he has a deadline or his boss is out of town, well that’s some serious unfortunate luck.

 
 
Rule 3: If all else fails, go home, take a long hot shower, breath and learn.  One night stands are always a little awkward and strange. My fail safe advice: pick yourself up and get out of his place leaving regrets behind and collecting your dignity on the way out.

An apple a day..??.. Keep it away..? No.. a spoon full of sugar makes the?.. Veggies go down? No!!.. it’s..

..You must eat your vegetables! You must eat your vegtables! Yes, yes we’ve heard this more than once, usually in the form of loving maternal dogma. Growing up in my house was achingly fat-free; our kitchen an arid wasteland empty of all sugar and processed foods. My sisters and I had greasy and plump dreams about fast food. Nightly I lived out my favorite fantasy as I finally reached those glorious golden arches! Walking up to the counter at McDonalds, I would taste the anticipation as I drank in the menu. So many salty options! So much gratifying grease! How my stomach quivered with a quixotic feeling of cholesterol-filled fullness! 

I could count the number of times we ate fast food on both my hands. My mother liked to torture us with innocent trips to McDonalds during which she ordered a coffee for herself and absolutely nothing for us! She would dryly remark that she needed the coffee to deal with us. We were also entirely oblivious to the existence of easy and cheap staples like top-ramen. I was deeply envious of the kids who could enjoy it and truly thought it was an exotic noodle! My mother’s ideology dictated only wise and healthful choices for us day after day. We weren’t lucky enough to wake up to colorful charms each morning. That giant smile of Mr. Kool-aid was a broad, superior smirk to us.

  
At school, I envied the kids their wonderful processed treats in their colourful lunch boxes; my lunch came in an easily recycled, disposable brown paper bag and contained a turkey sandwich, a bag of carrots and a Capri sun. This was it. Chow Groundhog Day year in, year out. To this day, I hate cold cut sandwiches. I would rather eat my mattress than a cold cut turkey sandwich (actually, in my opinion, turkey resembles slabs of flabby human flesh). I often had guilty fantasies of ditching my lunch but knowing I would go hungry made me cautious. My Hello Kitty erasers smelled amazing but even as an alternative to my lunch, I knew that my mother would state that they were simply empty calories.

 

At home my sister and I made a number of futile attempts to undermine our indoctrination.   Our scheme to continually hide packets of fiberous and hearty oatmeal under the sofa was eventually foiled when we had visitors to stay who moved the sofa one night to make it up as bed.  We were revealed on another occasion when our mother became wise to some crafty subterfuge.  Her protein milkshakes in which she would crack an egg yolk and blend in milk, were meant to foster the energy to get straight A’s. Since I hated milk and the idea of drinking egg yolks, it didn’t seem so terrible to pour it all down the drain as soon as her back was turned – until she found us at it.  This was admittedly lower than the oatmeal scheme. We knew not to ever cross my mother after that! 

 
Well, one has to love their mother.  She meant well but I curse her for my current irrepressible cravings. Hamburgers will always be an illicit choice for me but I continue to eat and eat them. These days there is simply no limit to what I will put in my mouth (I’m talking food here). I rationalise that I’m a big girl and if I want a salty burger, I will have a salty burger. Driving like a rebel  in the night, the gates of heaven are the McDonald’s drive through. Unfortunately, driving through them whilst maintaining  a svelte silhouette is not possible. Still, what better way is there to end a stressful night? Or dull a sharp breakup? When I take a big bite -I don’t think I’ve ever had a small bite - anyway, when I take a bite of a burger, I taste everything at once. Bread,meat, ketchup, lettuce, tomatoes, pickles, onions. When you think about it, you don’t have to open up your burger to notice they’ve skimped on your favorite ingredient. You simply take a bite and say ‘MF they forgot the onions’. 

I’m finally growing out my bangs after a five year run, and I’m finding them hard to part with… NO, I mean literally, hard to part with.. They keep falling over my eyes, I part them from side to side, and again just seconds later, no part and down over my eyes blinding me completely. They’re driving me bananas and I look rather ridiculous, but ten days past my normal bang trim due date and this time I’m in it to win it. I’ve never made it past day fourteen..

..check in with me in another week.. until then, here are some bang’n chicks to feast your hairless eyes on..